Talking Clock
After closing time at the bar, a drunk was proudly showing off
his new apartment to a couple of friends. He led the way to his
bedroom where there was a big brass gong and a mallet.
"What's up with the big brass gong?" one of his guests asked.
"It's not a gong. It's a talking clock," the drunk replied.
"A talking clock? Seriously?" asked his astonished friend.
"Yup," replied the drunk.
"How's it work?" the friend asked, squinting at it.
"Watch," the drunk replied. He picked up the mallet, gave the
gong an ear-shattering pound, and stepped back.
The three stood looking at one another for a moment.
Suddenly a voice on the other side of the wall screamed...
"Hey, quiet!!! It's three-fifteen in the morning!"
That's the answer to "I wouldn't give you the time of day."
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