Thursday, March 15, 2012

Irish Jokes for St. Patrick's Day...




How Many Ducks?

On the bus Paddy got chatting to Murphy who was
carrying a bag on his back.

"What's in the bag?" asked Paddy.

"I'm not going to tell," replied Murphy.

"Go on, do." pleaded Paddy.

"Ah, all right then, it's ducks." announced Murphy.

"If I guess how many ducks you have in the bag, will
 you give me one of them?" enquired Paddy.

"Look," said Murphy, "if you guess the correct number,
 I'll give you both of them."

"Five!" said Paddy triumphantly.

*****

Not Guilty

O'Gara was arrested and sent for trial for armed bank
 robbery.
After due deliberation, the jury foreman stood up and
 announced, "Not guilty."

"That's grand!" shouted O'Gara. "Does that mean I get to
 keep the money?"