Fun and Funny Quotes
"A bore is a man who, when you ask him how he is, tells you."
- B. L. Taylor
"No man is an island, but some of us are pretty long peninsulas."
- Ashleigh Brilliant
"Sometimes I wonder if men and women really suit each other.
Perhaps they should live next door and just visit now and then."
- Katharine Hepburn
"If men can run the world, why can't they stop
wearing neckties? How intelligent is it to start the
day by tying a little noose around your neck?"
- Linda Ellerbee
"I base most of my fashion taste on what doesn't itch."
- Gilda Radner
"Hearing nuns' confessions is like being stoned
to death with popcorn."
- Bishop Fulton Sheen
"When I told the people of Northern Ireland that I
was an atheist, a woman in the audience stood up and said,
'Yes, but is it the God of the Catholics or the God of
the Protestants in whom you don't believe?'"
- Quentin Crisp
"A sure cure for seasickness is to sit under a tree."
- Spike Milligan
"My uncle's dying wish - he wanted me on his lap...
He was in the electric chair."
- Rodney Dangerfield
"For three days after death, hair and fingernails continue
to grow but phone calls taper off."
- Johnny Carson