Leave Your Name at the Beep
Here are actual answering machine greetings recorded and verified by
the world-famous International Institute of Answering Machines:
* A is for academics, B is for beer. One of those reasons is why
we're not here. So, leave a message.
* Hi. This is John. If you are the phone company, I already sent the money.
If you are my parents, please send money. If you are my financial aid
institution, you didn't lend me enough money. If you are my friends,
you owe me money. If you are a female, don't worry, I have plenty
* Hello. I am David's answering machine. What are you?
* Hi. I'm probably home, I'm just avoiding someone I don't like.
Leave a message, and if I don't call back, it's you.
* Hello, you are talking to a machine. I am capable of receiving messages.
My owners do not need siding, windows or a hot tub, and their carpets
are clean. They give to charity through their office and do not need
their picture taken. If you're still with me, leave your name and number
and they will get back to you.
* Hi, this is George. I'm sorry I can't answer the phone right now.
Leave a message and then wait by the phone until I call you back.
* This is not an answering machine - this is a telepathic, thought-recording
device. After the tone, think about your name, your number, and your
reason for calling, and I'll think about returning your call.
* Hi! John's answering machine is broken. This is his refrigerator.
Please speak very slowly, and I'll stick your message to myself
with one of these magnets.
... thanks, Donna!!
Have you ever recorded a humorous message?
Would you like to share it?