New Lease on Life
In surgery after a heart attack, a middle-aged woman has a
vision of God by her bedside. "Will I die?" she asks.
God says, "No. You have 30 more years to live."
With 30 years to look forward to, she decides to make the
best of it. Since she’s in the hospital, she gets breast implants,
liposuction, a tummy tuck, hair transplants, and collagen
injections in her lips. She looks great!
The day she’s discharged, she exits the hospital with a swagger,
crosses the street, and is immediately hit by an ambulance and
Up in Heaven, she sees God. "You said I had 30 more years to
live," she complains.
"That’s true," says God.
"So what happened?"
God shrugs. "I didn’t recognize you."