A Blonde's Year in Review
January
Took new scarf back to store because it was too tight.
February
Fired from pharmacy job for failing to print labels.
Helllloooo!!!... Bottles won't fit in printer!!!
March
Got really excited... finished jigsaw puzzle in 6 months!
Box said "2-4 years!"
April
Trapped on escalator for hours... power went out!!!
May
Tried to make Kool-Aid... wrong instructions... 8 cups of
water won't fit into those little packets!!!
June
Tried to go water skiing... couldn't find a lake with a slope.
July
Lost breast stroke swimming competition... learned later,
the other swimmers cheated, they used their arms!!!
August
Got locked out of my car in rain storm... car swamped
because soft-top was open.
September
The capital of California is "C"... isn't it???
October
Hate M & M's... they are so hard to peel.
November
Baked turkey for 4 1/2 days... instructions said 1 hour
per pound and I weigh 108!!
December
Couldn't call 911, duh... there's no "eleven" button on
the stupid phone!!!
The August joke reminds me of the story about the Polish man who accidntly locked his keys inside his car. It took him an hour and a half but he finally got his wife and kids out.
ReplyDeleteI wonder if his wife was a blonde.
D