Fun and Funny Quotes...

Fun and Funny Quotes

"Life is a tragedy for those who feel,
and a comedy for those who think."
- Jean De La Bruyre
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"When we talk to God, we're praying.
When God talks to us, we're schizophrenic."
- Jane Wagner
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"Some people are like Slinkies -
not really good for anything, but you still can't help
but smile when you see one tumble down the stairs."
- Author Unknown
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"The trouble with being punctual is that nobody's there
to appreciate it."
- Franklin P. Jones
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"When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second.
when you sit on a red-hot cinder a second seems like an hour.
That's relativity."
- Albert Einstein
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"Always get married early in the morning. That way,
if it doesn't work out, you haven't wasted a whole day."
- Mickey Rooney
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"I haven't reported my missing credit card to the police
because whoever stole it is spending less than my wife."
- Ilie Nastase
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"Swearing was invented as a compromise between
running away and fighting."
- Finley Peter Dunne
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"Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight."
- Phyllis Diller
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"The secret of staying young is to live honestly,
eat slowly, and lie about your age."
- Lucille Ball
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"Age does not diminish the extreme disappointment of having
a scoop of ice cream fall from the cone."
- Jim Fiebig
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"Without ice cream, there would be darkness and chaos."
- Don Kardong