Fun and Funny Quotes...

Fun and Funny Quotes

"Before I speak, I have something important to say."
- Groucho Marx
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"She got her good looks from her father. He's a plastic surgeon."
- Groucho Marx
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"My neighbor asked if he could use my lawnmower and I told him
of course he could, so long as he didn't take it out of my garden."
- Eric Morecambe
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"On cable TV they have a weather channel - 24 hours of weather.
We had something like that where I grew up. We called it a window."
- Dan Spencer
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"A letter is an unannounced visit, the postman the agent of
rude surprises. One ought to reserve an hour a week for
receiving letters and afterwards take a bath."
- Friedrich Nietzsche
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"People always ask me, 'Were you funny as a child?'
Well, no, I was an accountant."
- Ellen DeGeneres
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"If you really want something in life you have to work for it.
Now quiet, they're about to announce the lottery numbers."
- Homer Simpson,'The Simpsons'
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"Never argue with a fool. People might not know the difference."
- David Letterman
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"Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool."
- Robert Frost
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"This is my depressed stance. When you're depressed,
it makes a lot of difference how you stand. The worst thing
you can do is straighten up and hold your head high because
then you'll start to feel better. If you're going to get any joy
out of being depressed, you've got to stand like this."
- Charles Schulz, Charlie Brown