Fun and Funny Quotes...

Fun and Funny Quotes

"We make our friends; we make our enemies;
but God makes our next-door neighbor."
- Gilbert K. Chesterton
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"It's always darkest before the dawn. So if you're going to steal
your neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it."
- Author Unknown
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"I have six locks on my door all in a row. When I go out,
I lock every other one. I figure no matter how long somebody
stands there picking the locks, they are always locking three."
- Elayne Boosler
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"When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping.
Men invade another country."
- Elayne Boosler
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"Skiing combines outdoor fun with knocking down
trees with your face."
- Dave Barry
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"Eskimo: 'If I did not know about God and sin, would I go to hell?'
Priest: 'No, not if you did not know.'
Eskimo: 'Then why did you tell me??'"
- Annie Dillard
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"The only thing that stops God from sending another flood
is that the first one was useless."
- Nicholas Chamfort
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"Murphy was an optimist."
- O'Toole's Commentary
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"If you're going to tell people the truth,
be funny or they'll kill you."
- Billy Wilder
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"A good and wholesome thing is a little harmless fun in this world;
it tones a body up and keeps him human
and prevents him from souring."
- Mark Twain
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"It's all fun and games, until someone loses an eye...
then it's fun and games you can't see anymore."
- James Hetfield
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"If you never did you should.
These things are fun and fun is good."
- Theodor Geisel (Dr. Seuss)