Monday, January 10, 2011

Famous Witty Insults...




Famous Witty Insults


"His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork."
- Mae West


"He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends."
- Oscar Wilde


"He loves nature in spite of what it did to him."
- Forrest Tucker


"He is not only dull himself,
he is the cause of dullness in others."
- Samuel Johnson


"He has never been known to use a word that might send
a reader to the dictionary."
- William Faulkner


"I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play,
bring a friend... if you have one."
- George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill


"Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second...
if there is one."
- Winston Churchill, in reply


"Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without
any address on it?"
- Mark Twain


"I didn't attend the funeral,
but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it."
- Mark Twain


"I have never killed a man,
but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure."
- Clarence Darrow


"I've had a perfectly wonderful evening,
but... This wasn't it!!"
- Groucho Marx



1 comment:

  1. Val, most of these I've read before except the envelope without and address. Very funny.

    ReplyDelete

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