Thursday, October 13, 2011

Joke - Waiting in Line...



Waiting in Line


Here are the reasons I'd Like to thank Wal-Mart, K-Mart,
Target, and my local grocer for having 25 check-out lanes
and only three open at any given time.

Here are some creative ways to spend your time:


* Catch up on magazine reading.

* Retrieve the 13 things you forgot on your list.

* Be an annoying cell phone user and catch up on all the
phone calls to your insurance agent, mother-in-law,
and Auntie Anne.

* Catch a quick cat nap.

* Assess what other people have in their carts and get
exciting new dinner ideas.

* Finally apply a top coat of nail polish with plenty
of drying time.

* Run next door and pick up your dry cleaning.

* Practice your stand-up comedy routines on unsuspecting
fellow customers.

* Practice some standing yoga poses.

* Taste a cookie in the package of the newest low-carb,
zero-transfat, Splenda-saturated cookies.

* Breathe heavily on your T-bones so they're defrosted in
time for dinner so you won't have to leave them out on
the driveway in the hot late afternoon sun like you
normally do.


1 comment:

  1. Okay, Valerie, so I really do some of these things in line, LOL!! I don't really like to look thru all the mags, bc I think we should be paying for them, but if I really had to stand there for an hour or two, like behind a coupon lady, and Wal*Mart wouldn't open another lane, you better believe I'd read a mag or 3, LOL. Probably one that showed me how to design a room, do some art projects, put on some make up, and what the latest fashions are. And oh, that might really move me to put the nail polish on, LOL. I kid you not. If there was nobody behind me that would get sick (I'd ask for if someone were behind me), and they didn't mind, I'd do it, LOL. I have also been known to pick up my phone and make cell calls, even personal ones, but have asked people first. Even very personal calls, LOL, in public. BC I figure people don't know the people I'm talking to anyway! I've also taken naps in line, as you know, bc I have narcolepsy, LOL. I'll just get another customer to wake me up when it is my turn, LOL? Is all this making me the customer from heck, LOL? I have also turned to poor unsuspecting neighbors in line, and practiced my comedy routines on them, LOL. I don't think I meant to, however. I just talked, and they naturally laughed at me, LOL. Maybe they weren't laughing with me but at me. But I don't really know, they seemed to enjoy being able to talk w someone to make the time go by quicker also... When you get behind "extreme couponers" w/ no other registers to go to, it can be pure heck. And there's nothing you CAN do but make friends and chit chat. That and get ideas for what you can do for the next day. That is what I do when I am done reading the mags and talking to the folks. I get out a little pad of paper, and begin writing down all kinds of ideas. what would i like to be doing the next day? and what kind of decorating or art or jewelry ideas do i have? what chores need to be done in the next few days? what kind of charity work would i like to do this year? what charity projects can i do and how can they be carried out -- how would they work? so i obnoxiously start scribbling away. not too obnoxiously though -- i'm not really bothering anyone in line anymore w my phone calling or chit chatting. and then i think about blogging ideas, trying to come up w as many ideas as i can. oh, and yes, i really DO do yoga in line, LOL. i do it in dr's offices too. i do it everywhere! i learned it on a show. not the most strenuous stuff, but there are numerous poses i can do now -- not all of course that you can do in the grocery store, LOL, but some that you can! and it's great, it stretches you out and makes you feel better! and know what? the whole time i am doing these activities, i care not what others think, LOL. but i can irritate people by being too verbose! yes, me. but one thing i DON'T do, and i find VERY rude is SHOPPING FROM line. or being rude to the cashiers. or my fellow purchasers in line. i will never be rude to them! i used to be a cashier and i know what it was like, so i won't treat cashiers bad, customers bad, nor shop from line. did you know i was such a nut val, LOL. you probably did! okay, bye for now!

    krissy knox :)
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