Fun and Funny Quotes

Fun and Funny Quotes

"The shortest distance between two
points is under construction."
- Noelie Altito

"When you come to a fork
in the road, take it."
- Yogi Berra

"Bigamy is having one wife too many.
Monogamy is the same."
- Oscar Wilde

"Two things are infinite: the universe
and human stupidity; and I'm not
sure about the universe."
- Albert Einstein

"Experience is the name everyone
gives to their mistakes."
- Oscar Wilde

"Outside a dog, a book is man's best friend.
Inside a dog, it's too dark to read."
- Groucho Marx

"I told my psychiatrist that everyone
hates me. He said I was being ridiculous -
everyone hasn't met me yet."
- Rodney Dangerfield

"The pen is mightier than the sword,
and considerably easier to write with."
- Marty Feldman

"I worry that the person who thought up
Muzak may be thinking up something else."
- Lily Tomlin

"You have to walk carefully in the beginning
of love; the running across fields into your
lover's arms can only come later when
you're sure they won't laugh if you trip."
- Jonathan Carroll

"Sometimes when I look at my children,
I say to myself, 'Lillian, you should
have remained a virgin.'"
- Lillian Carter (mother of Jimmy Carter)

"Why would you have cake if
you couldn't eat it, too?"
- HBS