Showing posts with label fun and funny Christmas quotes and sayings. Show all posts
Showing posts with label fun and funny Christmas quotes and sayings. Show all posts

Monday, December 13, 2010

Fun and Funny Santa Quotes...



Fun and Funny Santa Claus Quotes


"In this age of instant coffee, overnight rush deliveries,
and 30-second media sound bites, it's not surprising that
children have discovered that their letters to Santa Claus
can be sent by email."
- Patrick Flaherty


"I never believed in Santa Claus because I knew no white
dude would come into my neighborhood after dark."
- Dick Gregory


"I stopped believing in Santa Claus when I was six.
Mother took me to see him in a department store and
he asked for my autograph."
- Shirley Temple


"If you ever have to steal money from your kid, and later on
he discovers it's gone, I think a good thing to do is to blame
it on Santa Claus."
- Jack Handy


"Why is Christmas just like a day at the office?
You do all the work and the fat guy with the suit
gets all the credit."
- Author Unknown


"The Bermuda Triangle got tired of warm weather.
It moved to Alaska. Now Santa Claus is missing."
- Steven Wright


"Santa Claus has the right idea -
visit people once a year."
- Victor Borge


"You know you are getting old when Santa
starts looking younger."
- Robert Paul


"A good many things go around in the dark
besides Santa Claus."
- Herbert Hoover


"Aren't we forgetting the true meaning of Christmas?
You know... the birth of Santa."
- Bart Simpson, 'The Simpsons'


Monday, December 6, 2010

Fun and Funny Christmas Quotes...




Fun and Funny Christmas Quotes


"In the old days, it was not called the Holiday Season;
the Christians called it 'Christmas' and went to church;
the Jews called it 'Hanukka' and went to synagogue;
the atheists went to parties and drank. People passing
each other on the street would say 'Merry Christmas!'
or 'Happy Hanukka!' or (to the atheists)
'Look out for the wall!'"
- Dave Barry


“I bought my Christmas tree today. I think I made
a mistake though. I bought the three year extended
warranty. I don’t think I need that.”
- Jay Leno


"Mail your packages early so the post office
can lose them in time for Christmas."
- Johnny Carson


"Anyone who believes that men are the equal of women has
never seen a man trying to wrap a Christmas present."
- Author Unknown


"The worst gift is a fruitcake. There is only one fruitcake in
the entire world, and people keep sending it to each other."
- Johnny Carson


"Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people once a year."
- Victor Borge


"Oh look, yet another Christmas TV special! How touching
to have the meaning of Christmas brought to us by cola,
fast food, and beer... Who'd have ever guessed that product
consumption, popular entertainment, and spirituality would
mix so harmoniously?"
- Bill Watterson, 'Calvin & Hobbes'


"Next to a circus there ain't nothing that packs up and
tears out faster than the Christmas spirit."
- Frank McKinney Hubbard


"Merry Christmas, Nearly Everybody!"
- Ogden Nash


"Roses are reddish
Violets are bluish
If it weren't for Christmas
We'd all be Jewish."
- Benny Hill