Joke - The Cemetery Shortcut

The Cemetery Shortcut

One dark night two men were walking home after a party and decided to take a shortcut through the cemetery just for laughs.

Right in the middle of the cemetery they were startled by a tap-tap-tapping noise coming from the misty shadows.

Trembling with fear, they found an old man with a hammer and chisel, chipping away at one of the headstones.

"Holy cow, mister," one of them said after catching his breath,
"You scared us half to death! We thought you were a ghost!
What are you doing working here so late at night?"

"Those fools!" the old man grumbled, "They misspelled my name!"

Joke - What To Wear On Halloween (mild adult humor)

Click here for a Halloween giggle!

*mild adult humor

Joke - 10 Signs You Are Too Old For Halloween

10 Signs You Are Too Old For Halloween

1. You get winded from knocking on the door.

2. You have to have someone
chew the candy for you.

3. You ask for high fiber candy only.

4. When someone drops a candy bar in your bag,
you lose your balance and fall over.

5. People say, "Great Keith Richards mask!"
and you're not wearing a mask.

6. When the door opens you yell, "Trick or..."
and you can't remember the rest.

7. By the end of the night you have
a bag full of restraining orders.

8. You have to carefully choose a costume
that won't dislodge your hair piece.

9. You're the only Power Ranger in the
neighborhood with a walker.

10. You avoid going to houses
where your ex-wives live.

Joke - The Taxi Driver

The Taxi Driver

A passenger in a taxi leaned over to ask the driver a question and tapped him on the shoulder. The driver screamed, lost control of the cab, nearly hit a bus, drove up over a curb, and stopped just inches from a large plate glass window.

For a few minutes everything was silent in the cab, and then still shaking the driver said, "I'm sorry, but you scared the daylights out of me."

The frightened passenger apologized to the driver and said, "I had no idea a mere tap on the shoulder could frighten you so much."

The driver replied, "No, no, I'm sorry. It's entirely my fault. Today is my first day driving a cab... I've been driving a hearse for the last 25 years."