Thanksgiving Humor...

Thanksgiving-Themed Movies

1. To Kill a Walking Bird
2. My Best Friend's Dressing
3. The Texas Coleslaw Massacre
4. Casserolablanca
5. The Fabulous Baster Boys
6. 12 Hungry Men
7. Silence of the Yams
8. For Love of the Game Hen
9. I Know What You Ate Last Winter
10. All the President's Menu
11. White Meat Can't Jump
12. When Harry Met Salad
13. The Wing and I


The List

Planning a weekend of entertaining guests, I made a list of things I needed to do,
including taking food out of the freezer and grocery shopping.

As it happened, a friend whom I have been promising to take to lunch, asked if we
could make it that Friday. So, hopping into the car, I taped my list to the dash-
board and went and picked her up.

As she settled into the car her face dropped. "Thanks a lot!" she cried. Then I
glanced at my list and saw the first item: "Take out the Turkey".

Maxine Thanksgiving...

Maxine Celebrates Thanksgiving




Note: I wanted to let you know that I posted twice today in case you missed the
entry below. Also, I will be posting a holiday TV special schedule in this blog. Each
Monday I will give you a week's worth of specials! Stay tuned! I hope everyone is
having a lovely weekend... Sending joy... Val =)

A Funny - The 12 Days of Thanksgiving...

The 12 Days Of Thanksgiving

On the First Day...
We give thanks for the fresh turkey feast
and its hot trimmings.

On the Second Day...
We bless the cold turkey sandwiches,
sloshy cranberry sauce, and hard rolls.

On the Third Day...
We praise the turkey pie
and vintage mixed veggies.

On the Fourth Day...
We thank the pilgrims for not serving bison
that first time, or we'd be celebrating
Thanksgiving until April.

On the Fifth Day...
We gobble up cubed bird casserole and
pray for a glimpse of naked turkey carcass.

On the Sixth Day...
We show gratitude (sort of) to the creative cook
who slings cashews at the turkey and calls it Oriental.

On the Seventh Day...
We forgive our forefathers and pass
the turkey-nugget pizza.

On the Eighth Day...
The word ''vegetarian'' keeps popping into our heads.

On the Ninth Day...
We check our hair to make sure we're not
beginning to sprout feathers.

On the Tenth Day...
We hope that the wing meat kabobs
catch fire under the broiler.

On the Eleventh Day...
We smile over the creamed gizzard because
the thigh bones are in sight.

On the Twelfth Day...
We apologize for running out of turkey leftovers.
And everybody says Amen.

Thanksgiving Humor...

Thanksgiving Dinner Prepared By Children

actual Thanksgiving recipes given by kids in a kindergarten class...

A Thanksgiving Cookbook
- by Mrs. Geraghty's Kindergarten Class

NOTE: Mrs. Geraghty will not be reponsible for medical bills resulting from use of her
cookbook.

Ivette - Banana Pie
You buy some bananas and crust. Then you mash them up and put them in the pie.
Then you eat it.

Russell - Turkey
You cut the turkey up and put it in the oven for ten minutes and 300 degrees. You put
gravy on it and eat it.

Geremy - Turkey
You buy the turkey and take the paper off. Then you put it in the refrigerator and
take it back out and cut it with a knife and make sure all the wires are out and take
out the neck and heart. Then you put it in a big pan and cook it for half an hour at
80 degrees. Then you invite people over and eat.

Andrew - Pizza
Buy some dough, some cheese and pepperoni. Then you cook it for 10 hours at 5
degrees. Then you eat it.

Shelby - Applesauce
Go to the store and buy some apples, and then you squish them up. Then you put them
in a jar that says, "Applesauce". Then you eat it.

Meghan H. - Turkey
You cut it into 16 pieces and then you leave it in the oven for 15 minutes and 4 degrees.
You take it out and let it cool and then after 5 minutes, then you eat it.

Danny - Turkey
You put some salt on it to make it taste good. Then you put it in the oven. Then you
cook it for an hour at 5 degrees. Then you eat it.

Brandon - Turkey
First you buy it at Fred Meyer. Then you cut it up and cook it for 15 hours at 200 degrees.
Then you take it out and eat it.

Megan K - Chicken
You put it in the oven for 25 minutes and 25 degrees and put gravy on it and eat it.

Christa - Cookies
Buy some dough and smash it and cut them out. Then put them in the oven for 2 hours
at 100 degrees. Then take them out and dry them off. Then it's time to eat them.

Irene - Turkey
Put it on a plate and put it in the oven with gravy. You cook it for 1 minute and for
100 degrees. Then it's all cooked. Your mom or dad cuts it and then eat.

Moriah - Turkey
First you cut the bones out. Then you put it in the oven for 10 hours at 600 degrees.
Then you put it on the table and eat it.

Vincent - Turkey
You cut and put sauce on it. Then you cook it for 18 minutes at 19 degrees . Then you
eat it with stuffing.

Jordyn - Turkey
First you have to cut it up and put it on a plate in the oven for 9 minutes and 18 degrees.
Then you dig it out of the oven and eat it.

Grace - Turkey
First you add some salt. Then you put it in a bowl. Then you put brown sugar on it.
Then you mix it all together with a spoon and then you add some milk and mix it again.
And then you put it in a pan. Then you put it in the oven for 15 minutes and 16 degrees.
Then you take it out of the oven and then you eat it.

Alan - Turkey
First you shoot it and then you cut it. And then you put it in the oven and cook it for
10 minutes and 20 degrees. You put it on plates and then you eat it.

Jordan Salvatore - Turkey
First you put it in the oven for 15 minutes at 100 degrees. Then you cut it up and then
you eat it.

Jordan Simons - Chocolate Pudding
Buy some chocolate pudding mix. Then you add the milk. Then you add the pudding
mix. Then you stir it. Then you put it in the refrigerator and wait for it to get hard.
Then you eat it.

Whitney - Turkey
Cut it and put it in the oven for 50 minutes at 60 degrees and then you eat it.

Jason - Chicken Pie
Put the chicken in the pot and put the salad and cheese and mustard and then you mix
it all together. Then put chicken sauce and stir it all around again. Then you cook it
for 5 minutes at 9 degrees. Then you eat it.

Christopher - Pumpkin Pie
First you buy a pumpkin and smash it. Then it is all done. And you cook it in the oven
for 12 minutes and 4 degrees. Then you eat it.

Christine - Turkey
First you buy the turkey. Then you cook it for 5 hours and 5 degrees. Then you cut it
up and you eat it.

Ashley - Chicken
Put it in the oven. Then cut it up. Then I eat it.

Jennie - Corn
My mom buys it. Then you throw it. Then you cook it. Then you eat it.

Jordan - Cranberry Pie
Put cranberry juice in it. Then you put berries in it. Then you put dough in it. Then
you bake it. Then you eat it.

Adam - Pumpkin Pie
First you put pumpkin seeds in it. Put it in a pan and bake it at 5 degrees for 6 minutes.
Then take it out and eat it.

Jarryd - Deer Jerky
Put it in the oven overnight at 20 degrees. Then you go hunting and bring it with you.
Then you eat it.

Christina - Turkey
Get the turkey. Put it in the oven. Cook it for 43 minutes at 35 degrees. Put it on a
plate, cut it up, then eat it.

Joplyn - Apple Pie
Take some apples, mash them up. Take some bread and make a pie with it. Get some
dough and squish it. Shape the dough into a pie shape. Put the apples in it. Then bake
it at 9 degrees for 15 minutes.

Isabelle - Spaghetti
Put those red things in it. Then put the spaghetti in it. Then cook it in the oven for
2 minutes at 8 degrees.

Bailey - Chicken
Put pepper and spices on it. Cook for one hour at 60 degrees. Then eat it.

Nicholas - White and Brown Pudding
First you read the wrapper. Get a piece of water. Stir. Then you eat it.

Sean - Turkey
Put it in the oven for 5 minutes at 55 degrees. Take it out and eat it.

Lauren - Turkey
First you find a turkey and kill it. Cut it open. Put it in a pan. Pour milk in the pan.
Put a little chicken with it. Put salsa on it. Take out of pan. Put it on the board. Cut
into little pieces. Put on a rack. Put in the oven for 7 minutes at 10 degrees. Take out
of the oven and put eensy weensy bit of sugar on it. Put a little more salsa on it. Then
you eat it.

Olivia - Corn
Get hot water and put on stove. Wait for 8 minutes. Put corn in. Then put it on a
plate. Then eat.

Siera - Pumpkin Pie
Get some pumpkin and dough for the crust. Get pumpkin pie cinnamon. Cook it for
20 minutes at 10 degrees.

Kayla - Turkey
Buy it. Take it home. Then you cook it. Put it in the oven for 1 hour. Take it out of
the oven. Put it on a plate. Then you eat it.

Tommy - Pumpkin
Cook the pumpkin. Then get ready to eat the pumpkin.

Wai - Pumpkin Pie
Get a pumpkin. Cook it. Eat it.

Thanksgiving Humor...

Forgetful Turkey Shopper

It's the day before Thanksgiving, and the butcher is just locking up when a man
begins pounding on the front door.

"Please let me in," says the man desperately. "I forgot to buy a turkey, and my wife
will kill me if I don't come home with one."

"Okay," says the butcher, "Let me see what I have left."

He goes into the freezer and discovers that there's only one scrawny turkey left.
He brings it out to show the man.

"That's too skinny. What else you got?" says the man.

The butcher takes the bird back into the freezer and waits a few minutes and brings
the same turkey back out to the man.

"Oh, no," says the man, "That one doesn't look any better. You better give me both of
them!"

A Better Turkey

A turkey farmer was always experimenting with breeding to make a better turkey.
His family was fond of the leg portion for dinner and there were never enough legs
for everyone.

After many frustrating attempts, the farmer was relating the results of his efforts
to his friends at the General Store get-together. "Well I finally did it! I bred a turkey
that has 6 legs!"

They all asked the farmer how it tasted.

"I don't know," said the farmer. "I never could catch the darn thing!"